Lovers and Train Rides..

The other day my friend asked me advice on love... He just does not understand women..

Well, He thinks he doesn't.. I think he does, but he chooses not to see.. I think it's not always that men don't understand women or vice-versa, I think that it's both women and men do not understand Love..

I'm not claiming to be a guru, I have as much of no idea as everyone else, and just as many failures and wins, but I do understand travel and journeys and destinations... Love is pretty much the same,  and easier to understand anyway in any analogy that takes the 'feeling' out of it lest it hurt your heart..

Here's what i said to him;

Relationships are like trains at stations, we hold onto a train at our 'station' that is not actually the right train for us. It won't take us where we want to go, cannot house us on our journey comfortably and we hold on so goddamn tight because we WANT it to be the right train that we can't see we have not only blocked our station, there's no room for our RIGHT train to enter.. The right train who's sitting just outside the platform, patiently waiting their turn to enter into our station, unable to do so because we won't let the wrong train move on....

Now, I didn't make this up, I heard this many moons ago, spoken by a very wise woman who is world renowned and published and in all honesty a bit of a bloody legend..

Anyway, it took me a very long time to understand this concept.. Oh I understood it, but I just didn't 'GET' it.. Getting it takes time.. I think when it comes to love, real love, true love, It can almost feel like you are drowning.. Especially if you've never really felt that strength in your heart before for another.. Its like being out of your depth in the deep end of the pool, and you panic.. You feel like you're struggling to stay afloat and not drown either in the depths of new love, or out of control old love that's hit choppy waters. You grasp and thrash and the relationship or other person feels like they are drowning with you.. My advice??? Let go, take a breath, stop panicking, don't forget when drowning one rolls over on their back QUIETLY without grasping and just floats, just IS,, so let go!! because your panic and control is ruining it for you, and if you let go you might actually keep it alive..

You see Love is about trust.. It's hard to just 'TRUST' the process, but trust you must.. What will be will be, if you're meant to be with him or her you will be, no amount of pushing or pulling it, tugging or suffocating or trying to control it will change it.. Destiny has control so just let it be and trust.. It may fall apart to fall back together properly.. And if it doesn't work it's because something better needs you to make the room for it to enter.. We never think when a relationship breaks down we will be happy again, but fact is we always are, because what comes along or sticks around serves us better, suits us better and if we get the train concept is normally going where we actually want to go, with someone who actually wants to go there with us..

Well that's my take on it anyway.. I never said it was easy though..

Toot, toot..

Mama, Madly...