So I'm a SAHM and a crafting Mama, for all of you who do not know what SAHM means its "Stay at home Mum".. I do work a job also, but majority of my time I am a SAHM.. I have 4x kids, teens to toddlers, and on some level I almost feel that being a SAHM is not enough.. I know how hard my job is.. I know others Mum's also know how hard my job is, especially those that are also sahm, but on some internal level that I don't often show and which I am 99.5% positive most other Mama's also feel, I actually feel like just being 'Mum' to my children is not worthy.. I know absolutely on every level it absolutely is, but somewhere along the line what society and 'everyone' else thinks has made me stray from the path of good and down the path of self doubt and worthiness... It amazes me how I not only doubt my 'parenting' choices but I also consistently stress myself out with what others may think about how I spend my time whether in my Mama/life world or out in the business world.. Why seriously does it matter to me what others, especially those of little to no importance in my life or heart, think about how I conduct my life.. Why do we ALL do this!!???
So this brings me to my actual point, I craft, I have a Facebook page / small business *Poetic Baby* and I create.. Lots of gorgeous little OOAK kids clothes and bits and pieces that I love doing.. Its all based on vintage funky fabric's and old school fun and love of yesteryear and it makes me happy... Well it did.. Until I started to feel this unbelievable pressure to 'produce'.. I know a lot of women have amazing pages and create the most beautiful things and do so consistently, but the reality is for myself, I have two older kids in high school, one child in primary school (who is disabled and needs double time and attention, which I'm very happy to do) and a One and a half year old bubba girl who is most definitely my last and whom I want to enjoy every moment with, especially seeing as it took me 15yrs to have my 'little girl'.. I actually really love my life..
I look at these other pages and I honestly think "Where the hell do these women find the time!!!??".. They astound me.. and do they ever feel like me, crazy hair-brained, mess everywhere, wondering how exactly you are going to get only one thing done when in fact you really need to make 10 odd items.. Do we put the pressure on ourselves by thinking we are the only one's who do not have our complete sh*t together or do we pressure each other with false pretences of pretending that everything is just peachy, and life and business is amazingly fantastic and everything we touch turns to gold.. Especially when the reality is we actually are at home, still in PJ's at lunchtime, with crazy hair and snotty teething kids looking at our houses and messes thinking 'where the hell do I start'...
The other thing I have found which has disheartened me a little is the cattiness, do not get me wrong, I have met some of the most beautiful ladies, big of heart, sweet of spirit, who give me real joy just knowing that I am fortunate enough to have befriended then and they me.. I noticed a while ago (I will possibly get slammed for this, but meh, whatever) a number of people on a saccharine sweet attack front regarding people copying them etc, going as far as actually attacking them on the public forum that is FB, which to me is akin to bullying.. It has never happened to me thankgod as I'm not backwards in coming forward and am sure it could have become quite unpleasant with me stating my opinions on the matter.. It kind of makes me giggle when I see women making sweeping statements that the flared pants or twirly skirts or pillowcase dresses they have been making, are being copied.. HELLOOO, there really aren't that many different ways of doing pants, skirts, tops etc.. Fair enough there are certain 'trademarks' by some crafters and in all fairness they should not be copied, it's just wrong on many levels and if they are then put it down to not only lack of imagination, but sometimes it's just inadvertent accidental similarities etc.. I do not agree with people who take idea's and run with them, especially when I see larger business pages with huge followings doing it to smaller pages and acting like it was all their own idea, but that works vice-versa also...
What I wonder is, "WHAT HAPPENED TO SISTERHOOD".. I've come to realise is that ALL of us ladies crafting, are mainly SAHM's and in our crafting are attempting to not only keep sane, and stay creative {which can be so easily lost amongst dirty nappies, and sleepless night, and scratched knee's and very first broken hearts} it also on occasion if we're not creating at a financial loss brings in a few extra dollars for the little things in life our kidlets love, like maybe a pizza night, we would not otherwise be able to afford.. Some of us do it as our form of 'outside' / 'adult' contact, to keep us sane, others to keep busy due to things like Post Natal Depression or just because it is the one thing that actually gives our hearts Joy.. And yet some women continue to slam each other!!!??? I just don't get it.....
It makes me so sad when I see bad behaviour by crafting Mama's and Women, am I one of the only women left who really feels that women need to support women, lift each other up not bring someone down.. I love my crafting friends, I feel joy for them when they 'create' something new that they are proud of, I share their happy moments when they have mastered something they didn't feel they would be able to, I dance with them when they just have a 'good' day...
I say, lets stop the negativity and embrace the amazing collective of creative spirit out there, let's celebrate how amazing us 'Women' can be, lets stop the negativity and if we do have an issue then instead of reverting to high school behaviour take it up personally with the supposed perpetrator at hand, lets be honest about when we are having a bad day and just support each other, lets stop pressuring ourselves and each other because above everything else, pressure is exactly the opposite of what beautiful creative spirit should be giving us in our lives and hearts... I am more than happy to have a virtual glass of wine when the kids have gone to bed, with all my amazing crafty 'friends' I have made via my page, I think these ladies rock, and inspire me so very much..
I do love my crazy messed up crafting life... I love being able to be at home at the moment with my babies, big and little.. I love crafting for crafting.. and i love my positive and happy little space I have created in my life, even if I cant always meet my own crazy ideals or deadlines (where the only expectation of what I can make is made by me).. I would love any and all who feel somehow the same to join me on this happy sometimes eclectic path, and others who scoff to just keep walking...
I am not crazy for the act of crafting, but on occasion I do craft a little crazy ;))
Love love
Mama, Madly... xx
